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Let’s explore the ins and outs of Experiential Therapy, shedding light on its various types, benefits, limitations, and the process of finding a suitable therapist.
Experiential therapies are based on the idea that people can learn and grow by having new experiences. They focus on helping people develop new ways of thinking and behaving and to become more aware of their emotions and how they affect their behavior.
In the realm of psychotherapy, experiential therapy emerges as a distinct approach that places the client’s immediate experiences at the forefront of the therapeutic process. This immersive modality deviates from traditional talk therapy by venturing beyond verbal communication and exploring the client’s world. It aims to bring the client into the present moment and help them observe their thoughts and feelings without judgment. Clients learn to do this through various means, such as role-playing, art therapy, music therapy, or psychodrama.
More specifically, this form of therapy emphasizes the importance of human experience and the therapeutic value of engaging activities. Experiential therapy is categorized into the experiential–subjective quadrant to highlight its focus on subjective experiences. Furthermore, it can also reduce depression severity and suicidal ideation, indicating its potential to address a multitude of mental health concerns.
You can attend many types of experiential therapies, including:
These are just a few of the many types of experiential therapy available. Each type of therapy has its own unique benefits, and the best type of therapy for a particular individual will depend on their needs and preferences.
One significant advantage of experiential therapy is its ability to facilitate a deeper understanding of yourself and your emotions. Through various experiential techniques, clients gain insights into their inner world, recognizing patterns, triggers, and underlying issues that may be contributing to their difficulties. This self-awareness empowers individuals to make informed choices and take control of their lives.
Another key benefit of experiential therapy is the development of healthier coping mechanisms. By engaging in experiential activities, clients learn practical strategies for managing stress, regulating emotions, and resolving conflicts. These skills prove invaluable in navigating life’s challenges and promoting overall well-being.
Experiential therapy also plays a vital role in improving relationships with others. By fostering empathy, communication, and collaboration, experiential activities enhance interpersonal skills and strengthen bonds between individuals. This can lead to more fulfilling relationships, both personally and professionally.
Interpersonal Communication Skills
Additionally, the application of the symbolic‐experiential model of psychotherapy to neuroscience has been explored, indicating the relevance of experiential therapy in the context of interpersonal communication and psychological interventions.
Furthermore, experiential therapy has proven effective in overcoming trauma and other difficult experiences. By providing a safe and supportive environment, experiential therapy allows clients to process and integrate traumatic memories, reducing their impact on daily life. Through this process, individuals can gain closure, heal from past wounds, and move towards a more positive and fulfilling future.
Social Anxiety Disorder
Experiential techniques have been found to complement compassion-focused therapy (CFT). CFT, an integrated and multimodal approach, draws from evolutionary, social, developmental, and Buddhist psychology, and neuroscience. Compassion-focused therapy (CFT) has been recognized as an effective way to address shame and self-criticism, which are commonly experienced with conditions like social anxiety disorder. Combining this approach with experiential practices helps addresssocial anxiety and similar conditions by challenging patients to process emotions evenwhen doing so might be difficult or something they try to avoid entirely.
Personality Disorders
Experiential therapy can address ipersonality disorders, such as narcissistic personality disorder, highlighting its ability to support approaches like emotion‐focused therapy and compassion‐focused therapy. These therapeutic modalities emphasize the importance of addressing maladaptive interpersonal patterns and complex clinical challenges in patients with personality disorders, including emotional dysregulation, powerlessness, and negative self-evaluation.
Psychedelic Therapy
Experiential therapy has also been recognized for its potential to enhance psychedelic therapy and promote lasting change. Combining psychedelic therapy with experiential therapies has been found to enhance client self-understanding, further emphasizing the significance of the therapeutic relationship. in promoting therapeutic evolution.
Family Therapy
In the context of family therapy, Experiential techniques in family therapy actively include children in sessions, emphasizing the practical benefits of experiential approaches in family therapy settings. Additionally, using experiential education to inform treatments like adventure therapy and outdoor education underscores the broad applicability of this type of learning in diverse settings.
There are a few things to consider when looking for an experiential therapist, such as your specific needs and goals, the different types of experiential therapy available, and the therapist’s training and experience.
Experiential therapists are trained to serve as compassionate guides, fostering a secure environment where clients feel empowered to explore their emotions, sensations, and interactions in the present moment. This therapeutic journey is rooted in the belief that your lived experiences hold the key to understanding struggles and unlocking your potential for growth and healing.
Moreover, experiential training and personal therapy are often essential strategies to enhance a therapist’s self-awareness and skills, emphasizing the professional significance of experiential approaches in therapy. Experiential Therapy has been found to bridge the gap between academia and clinical practice, fostering skills necessary for best practice in other therapeutic modalities and forms. This gives providers the ability to reflect and grow from their clinical experiences in creative and more dynamic ways, and in so doing, give their clients alternative ways of processing their conditions.
Experiential therapy is a powerful form of psychotherapy that can help people gain a deeper understanding of themselves and their emotions, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and improve their relationships with others. However, it is not appropriate for everyone and has limitations to consider.
For example, experiential therapy can be expensive. Many insurance companies do not cover experiential therapy, and the cost of therapy can vary depending on the type of therapy, the therapist’s experience, and the location of the therapy. This may make access to experiential therapy difficult for some. Check with your insurance provider to see what coverage options you have. If you do not have coverage, but found a program that fits your needs, talk with the providing group to see what options may accommodate your financial needs.
Another limitation of experiential therapy is finding a qualified therapist. Experiential therapy is a specialized field, and not all therapists are trained in this type of therapy.
Experiential therapy can also be emotionally challenging. This type of therapy can involve exploring painful emotions and experiences, which can be difficult to process. It is important to be prepared for the emotional challenges of experiential therapy before you begin this type of therapy.
Despite these limitations, experiential therapy can be a powerful tool for helping people heal and grow. If you are considering experiential therapy, remember to weigh the benefits and risks before you make a decision.
Experiential therapy’s introspective exploration can help you uncover hidden strengths, develop healthier coping mechanisms, and cultivate a profound sense of self-awareness and self-compassion.
Experiential therapy extends its reach beyond addressing mental health concerns, proving to be a potent catalyst for personal growth and development. It can empower people to enhance their communication skills, build stronger relationships, and navigate life’s transitions with greater resilience and adaptability.
By embracing the present moment and exploring their subjective experiences, patientsembark on a transformative journey of self-discovery and holistic well-being. This immersive approach not only heals wounds but also nurtures the seeds of personal growth, allowing you to blossom into your fullest potential.
Explore treatment centers and programs that provide experiential therapy to find the right fit for you.
References:
Bailey, M. (2022). Science catching up: experiential family therapy and neuroscience. Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 48(4), 1095-1110. https://doi.org/10.1111/jmft.12582
Bennett-Levy, J., Lee, N., Travers, K., Pohlman, S., & Hamernik, E. (2003). Cognitive therapy from the inside: enhancing therapist skills through practising what we preach. Behavioural and Cognitive Psychotherapy, 31(2), 143-158. https://doi.org/10.1017/s1352465803002029
Centonze, A., Popolo, R., MacBeth, A., & Dimaggio, G. (2023). Experiential techniques and therapeutic relationship in the treatment of narcissistic personality disorder: the case of laura. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 79(7), 1656-1669. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.23514
Gilbert, P. (2009). Introducing compassion-focused therapy. Advances in Psychiatric Treatment, 15(3), 199-208. https://doi.org/10.1192/apt.bp.107.005264
Knecht-Sabres, L. (2010). The use of experiential learning in an occupational therapy program: can it foster skills for clinical practice?. Occupational Therapy in Health Care, 24(4), 320-334. https://doi.org/10.3109/07380577.2010.514382
Matos, M. and Dimaggio, G. (2023). The interplay between therapeutic relationship and therapeutic technique: “it takes two to tango”. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 79(7), 1609-1614. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.23500
Newman, T., Alvarez, M., & Kim, M. (2017). An experiential approach to sport for youth development. Journal of Experiential Education, 40(3), 308-322. https://doi.org/10.1177/1053825917696833
Pereira, J. (2014). Can we play too? experiential techniques for family therapists to actively include children in sessions. The Family Journal, 22(4), 390-396. https://doi.org/10.1177/1066480714533639
Vos, M., Broek, E., Bernstein, D., Vallentin, R., & Arntz, A. (2017). Evoking emotional states in personality disordered offenders: an experimental pilot study of experiential drama therapy techniques. The Arts in Psychotherapy, 53, 80-88. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.aip.2017.01.003
Wolff, M., Evens, R., Mertens, L., Koslowski, M., Betzler, F., Gründer, G., … & Jungaberle, H. (2020). Learning to let go: a cognitive-behavioral model of how psychedelic therapy promotes acceptance. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 11. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2020.00005
Xu, H. and Tracey, T. (2016). Cultural congruence with psychotherapy efficacy: a network meta-analytic examination in china.. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 63(3), 359-365. https://doi.org/10.1037/cou0000145
Zeifman, R., Wagner, A., Watts, R., Kettner, H., Mertens, L., & Carhart‐Harris, R. (2020). Post-psychedelic reductions in experiential avoidance are associated with decreases in depression severity and suicidal ideation. Frontiers in Psychiatry, 11. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2020.00782
]]>Addiction thrives in the shadows of shame, deceit, and self-deception. It’s a disease that whispers lies, convincing individuals that they can outsmart or manage it on their own. This self-deception fuels a vicious cycle: as the grip of addiction tightens, it breeds a deep-seated self-loathing. In response, individuals often seek further escape through their addictive behaviors, perpetuating a downward spiral.
But what happens when you step into the light of truth? When you find one person to whom you can bare your soul, sharing every painful detail of your addiction and relapses? The act of brutal honesty can be transformative.
By sharing your struggles, you acknowledge that you’re not alone in this fight. You’re engaging in a shared human experience, one where empathy and understanding can flourish. This connection is vital, as addiction often thrives on loneliness and the feeling of being unworthy or judged.
It requires acknowledging the full extent of your addiction, including the painful realities you might have been avoiding. This level of self-awareness is crucial for recovery. It’s a clear-eyed assessment of where you are and what you need to do to move forward.
Sharing your truth with someone creates a sense of accountability. It’s much harder to slip back into old patterns when someone else knows the real story. Accountability can be a powerful motivator during moments of temptation or weakness.
It’s an act of self-compassion that begins to heal the wounds of self-loathing. Shame thrives in the dark. By bringing it into the light and getting honest about your struggles, you’re also affirming your worth and humanity. You’re saying, “I am more than my addiction, and I deserve to recover.”
The journey to recovery is complex, non-linear, and deeply personal. However, the power of brutal honesty shouldn’t be underestimated. It can break the chains of shame and self-deception, build connections rooted in empathy, and pave the way for a genuine, sustained recovery. Remember, in the battle against addiction, honesty is your strongest ally.
]]>This starts by identifying enabling behaviors and shifting them into empowering actions. By doing so, you not only support others in a healthier way, but reclaim your own happiness and peace of mind.
Here’s how to tell when your “helping” may not be helpful, and how to offer healthy support instead.
Helping involves supporting your loved one to tackle their own problems. This can include holding space, listening, and validating their feelings. Constructive help encourages people to develop their internal resources so they can overcome challenges with confidence.
Enabling, on the other hand, is doing things for others that they can do for themselves. Enablement prevents people from facing and learning from the consequences of their actions, which stunts their personal growth.
Enabling is defined1 as allowing or making it possible to “for someone to behave in a way that damages them.”
There’s a fine line between these two behaviors, and understanding the difference may take some time. But once you do, it becomes much easier to healthily navigate this dynamic.
Rather than trying to prevent people’s problems, we can let them experience their own struggles and support them through the process. Here’s what healthy helping looks like:
Instead of providing immediate solutions, you help your loved one find the tools they need to handle challenges on their own. This could include connecting them with relevant resources or offering words of encouragement.
You prompt your loved one to think critically about their situation and identify solutions. You might ask open-ended questions, give feedback, or cheer on their progress.
You appreciate your partner’s personal choices and ownership over their process.
When you fix someone’s problems for them, they may become reliant on you instead of developing the skills they need to move forward. Enabling might look like this:
If you’re in a pattern of enabling, you might already know it on some level, because it doesn’t feel good. Enabling can make you feel unhappy, confused, angry, depressed, or tired. Tuning into your physical and emotional warning signals can help you tell the difference between healthy support and enablement:
Ask yourself honestly if you’re helping for any of these reasons:
If any of these are true, enabling is at play.
From an outside perspective, the solution to others’ problems often seems obvious. Our desire to relieve others’ suffering is a normal part of being human. But paving someone’s path for them robs them of their journey—and their ability to figure life out for themselves.
If you’re helping because of a need to feel needed, you might be dealing with codependency.
Enabling behaviors are a very common aspect of codependent relationships. This pattern stems from a distorted sense of self-worth that causes one partner to seek validation through rescuing and caring for the other.
Codependency blurs boundaries and distorts healthy support. The codependent partner may take over tasks, justify toxic behavior, or offer financial support to their own detriment. This perpetuates a cycle where the partner receiving support becomes increasingly reliant and irresponsible, while their dependence ensures they’ll stick around. It’s an unhappy scenario for all involved.
Breaking out of this cycle is critical. Because of the deep attachments that are formed in the process, doing so may require the help of a therapist. One technique they might use is interpersonal psychotherapy (IPT), which focuses on improving interpersonal functioning. With professional support, you can address underlying issues and learn healthier ways of relating.
Boundaries are invisible lines that define our personal space and establish what we are—and aren’t—okay with. Relationships need them in order to thrive.
Clear boundaries are the key to promoting empowering behaviors and avoiding enabling ones. They allow us to say no without feeling guilty, protect our time and energy, maintain healthy self-esteem, and communicate openly. They’re not about pushing others away. In fact, they set the stage for a healthy relationship.
“A boundary is an expectation or parameter2 that you set with yourself or with another person. Boundaries can be physical, verbal, and they can be actions,” explains Nedra Glover Tawwab, author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace. To practice setting boundaries, try the following:
Setting boundaries is almost always somewhat uncomfortable.3 Much of the work is gaining tolerance for that discomfort. Remember: while it may not always feel like it, sometimes saying “no” can be the most loving gesture of all.
Good communication is especially important to discern between helping and enabling. Effective communication allows us to express our concerns and needs clearly, actively listen to the other person’s perspective, and build trust. You can improve your communication by practicing active listening and nonjudgment.
Active listening4 involves focusing fully on the other person’s words and feelings instead of waiting to interrupt with your own response. This shows care and respect and helps your partner feel understood.
Non-judgmental communication5 facilitates open dialogue by avoiding blame, criticism, or negativity. Try stating your own feelings without accusing your partner.
Everyone enters relationships with expectations, but they’re rarely verbally expressed. Talking through these with your partner allows them to clearly understand your needs. This can reduce resentment due to your needs being unmet.
Growth-minded couples take accountability for their actions, decisions, and consequences. Here are some ways to encourage personal responsibility in your relationships:
This isn’t about punishing or criticizing. It’s about empowering others to learn, grow, and become the best versions of themselves.
Sometimes, despite our best intentions, our efforts to help can inadvertently become enabling. Here are some strategies for intervening when you realize enabling is at play:
Because this is a sensitive dynamic, it’s important to address your concerns with empathy and understanding.
More extreme codependent dynamics can severely impact partners’ lives. If your situation is particularly sensitive, you may want to consider a professional intervention to approach your partner in the most effective way.
Understanding the nuances between helping and enabling can be challenging, especially in the context of real-life relationships. Let’s explore 2 scenarios to illustrate the difference in action:
Enabling: Your friend loses their job and asks you to cover their rent while they search for a new one. You agree, but they spend their days playing video games instead of actively looking for work. (You remove the natural consequences of joblessness, hindering their motivation to find a new job.)
Helping: You offer your friend emotional support and encouragement during their job search. You help them practice their interview skills, provide feedback on their resume, and connect them with potential job leads. (You empower your friend to take ownership of their situation and develop the skills they need to find employment.)
Enabling: Your family member struggles with addiction, and you constantly bail them out of financial trouble or give them access to drugs or alcohol. (This protects them from facing the negative consequences of their addiction and reinforces their dependence.)
Helping: You encourage them to seek professional help via an addiction treatment program. You offer emotional support throughout their recovery process and set clear boundaries, refusing to enable their addiction. (You empower them to play an active role in their own healing and recovery.)
Your desire to help others is a good thing. Learning how to do so without enabling means developing a wiser relationship with your compassion. Because when we love someone we should want what’s in their highest interest—and that includes their self-growth.
Codependent relationships can easily become draining and all-consuming. If you feel your relationship is headed in this direction and you need professional support, search our list of codependency treatment programs and reach out to a center today.
]]>Books, articles, videos and websites can provide information on a variety of topics related to addiction and mental health. These resources can be helpful for people struggling with addiction or mental health issues, as well as for their families and friends. They can educate on the causes of addiction and mental health disorders, the different types of treatment available, and how to coexist and cope with these conditions. Here are some websites and articles to get you started:
1. Recovery.com Resource Library
2. The National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI)
3. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH)
4. The American Psychological Association (APA)
5. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA)
6. The Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA)
7. The Suicide Prevention Resource Center
8. Consider furthering your education as an investment in yourself (and/or your loved one). Obtaining a certificate, academic degree, or simply engaging in general continuing education are all great ways to do this and learn more about recovery.
Crisis support provides immediate help to people who are experiencing a crisis or traumatic event. Crisis support can help people cope with strong emotions, develop/recall/access a safety plan, and practice healthy coping mechanisms. It can also help people connect with resources and services that can provide ongoing support. Here are a few to get you started:
9. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: call 988
10. The Crisis Text Line: text 741741
11. SAMHSA’s free, confidential helpline for addiction and mental health needs: call 1-800-662-4357
12. National Domestic Violence Hotline: call 1-800-787-3224
Lifestyle changes, big and small, can help you improve your overall wellbeing. When you make these changes, you can help improve your mood, reduce the risk of, and/or better manage, depression, anxiety, and stress. And, you can improve your overall quality of life.
13. Eat a healthy diet rich in fruits, vegetables, grains, and proteins.
14. Commit to regular exercise.
15. Aim for good quality sleep, then focus on the quantity that works for you (learn more below!)
16. Reduce stress with relaxation techniques.
17. Spend time with loved ones.
18. Prioritize hobbies and other activities that bring you joy.
19. Seek professional mental health or addiction help. You can use our website, Recovery.com, to browse treatment centers and connect with one that meets your needs.
20. Prioritize healthy, recovery-conducive online and in-person environments.
21. Purposefully spend time offline and away from social media.
Our physical health plays a significant role in our mental health and well-being. We are more likely to feel good about ourselves and to have a more optimistic outlook on life as we work on improving and maintaining good physical health. Consider these suggestions and tools to get you started:
22. Create an exercise plan that fits your lifestyle, so you can commit to it regularly and consistently.
23. Create a weekly meal plan, so you can eat well and nourish your body.
24. Spend time in nature, even if it’s your local park.
25. Practice stretching and yoga.
26. Try a new physical activity to keep you excited and engaged, such as martial arts or dance.
27. Join a gym or fitness center.
28. Have an accountability partner and/or workout buddy.
29. Consider hiring a personal trainer or signing up for an online fitness course.
30. Take scheduled breaks from technology.
31. Make an effort to be physically active each day, like going on a quick walk or taking the stairs. Small efforts add up!
32. Monitor your progress. Wearable technology, like a fitness watch, can help you track and log workouts, what you eat, and even how much sleep you’re getting.
Good food and nutrition are essential for overall health and the recovery journey. A healthy diet can help improve mood, energy levels, and sleep quality1. It can also help reduce stress, anxiety, and depression2. Nutrients are important for brain health and can help improve cognitive function as well. Here are some suggestions to get you started:
33. Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables.
34. Choose whole grains over refined grains.
35. Limit unhealthy fats, like trans fat (preservative oils found in most processed foods) and saturated fats (whole milk, red meat, and cheese).
36. Avoid added sugar. Look at a product’s nutrition label to see if there is added sugar.
37. When reading food labels, pay close attention to ingredient names that sound like chemicals. These ingredients may be harmful to your health, so it’s important to be aware of them and avoid them if possible.
38. Eat when you’re hungry, and be mindful of your body’s hunger and satiety signals.
39. Consistently eating enough to fuel your mind and body—and if you struggle to eat enough, be sure to tell your doctor.
40. Stay hydrated. Each person needs a unique amount of water to stay hydrated, but you can aim to drink before and after every meal and have a cup every hour.
41. Eat a variety of healthy foods that will nourish your mind and body.
42. Cook at home more often. Try ordering meal kits or shopping regularly for a few key items.
43. Be mindful of your eating habits, and consider a meal planning tracker/tool.
44. Consider consulting a nutritionist or dietician to help you with your dietary goals.
45. You can test for food allergies using online kits and resources. Knowing what your body does and doesn’t process well, or at all, can help you plan meals tailored to your body.
Self-reflection and spiritual practice can contribute to a healthy and fulfilling life. Such practices can help with examining our thoughts, feelings and actions, and ultimately, gain a deeper understanding of ourselves. Self-reflection and spiritual practice can also serve as coping mechanisms and tools to cope with stress, depression and anxiety. There are many different ways to practice self-reflection and spiritual growth. It is important to find practices that work for you. Here are some suggestions to get you started on finding yours:
46. Start by listening to yourself. Take time daily to process your own emotions and needs.
47. Consider utilizing other modes of expression to connect with yourself and your beliefs, like art, singing, and dancing.
48. Surround yourself with positive people that lift you up and offer support.
49. Set up boundaries to maintain your positivity and goals.
50. Practice gratitude. You can write down 5+ things you’re grateful for as soon as you wake up, before you go to bed, or before you meditate.
51. Consider journaling. You can write down thoughts and process strong emotions as they come, or set a time each day to journal.
52. Learn to forgive yourself and focus on progress, not perfection. Believe in yourself and remind yourself where you are, where you started, and where you’re on the way to being.
53. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and support from others.
54. Meditation, prayer, and connecting with nature can help you quiet your mind and focus on the present moment while expressing your thoughts and feelings.
55. Celebrate your successes!
56. Seek community in your religious group of preference. Some organizations have weekly groups and resources specifically for recovery.
Improving your mental health can help you avoid relapses and better your overall well-being. One of your best resources for mental wellness is therapy and connecting with mental health professionals. But, you can also use practices and tools to improve your mental health and compliment what you’re learning in therapy. Here’s a few options to consider:
57. Practice mindfulness and meditation.
58. Seek out a mental health professional based on your needs. Setting an appointment with a therapist, counselor, or psychologist can help you heal.
59. Create a toolbox of resources to help with relaxation, stress management, and more.
60. Be open to new, healthy, coping mechanisms and tools that can help you grow as a person.
61. Be proud of your progress!
62. Connect with others.
63. Identify your stress management emergency plan (hint: keep your wellness toolbox handy).
64. Remember, recovery is a journey, not a destination. There will be ups and downs, and that is ok. Don’t give up!
65. Tap into your creativity to express emotions. You can try painting, drawing, doodling, embroidery, writing, poetry, and so much more.
Sleep hygiene is very important. But as you explore improving it, think about it this way: work on the quality first, then focus on quantity. The important highlights are consistency and rhythm of routine. Once the quality of your sleep improves, you work on sleeping more. Recommendations often state 7-8 hours of sleep, but we may need more or less as we go through various stages of life. Listening to this, and analyzing why, is important. Here’s some other tips to bear in mind:
66. Wake up at the same time every morning.
67. Create a bedtime routine that you can stick to daily.
68. Try to view light from the sunrise and sunset each day. This helps realign your melatonin release system.
69. Limit screen time for at least one hour before bed.
70. Limit blue and white for at least 2 hours before bedtime–dim your lights or enjoy candlelight to stimulate melatonin release.
71. Read a boring book to help you get sleepy. Don’t read something that will get your heart rate going—think educational books, autobiographies, or most non-fiction novels.
72. Create a comfortable, soothing environment to sleep. Remember, your bed/bedroom is your sleeping sanctuary. Set the mood with ambient lighting, essential oils, and soft music.
73. Exercise can help make you more tired at bedtime. Consider activities like yoga, walking, jogging, or any other physical activity you like.
74. Address any sleep concerns you may have, like sleep apnea.
75. Don’t read the news, watch TV, or engage in other exciting activities before bed.
76. Make sure your bed is only used for sleeping—don’t work, eat, or lounge on your bed unless you’re lying down to sleep.
77. Set a morning routine that gives you plenty of time to complete morning chores and settle into your day. This can make waking up less stressful.
78. Take prescribed or herbal supplements as recommended/prescribed by your doctor. Be sure to take them only as prescribed.
79. If you aren’t falling asleep or feeling very sleepy within 30 minutes, get up and walk around, have a soothing beverage, or read a calming book until you start feeling tired.
80. Consider setting up a white noise machine or wearing earplugs if small noises wake you up and disrupt your sleep.
81. Prioritize sleep and maintain your bedtime routine—make new plans with friends or go home a little earlier to get to bed on time.
82. Some people experience ASMR (autonomous sensory meridian response) in response to visuals and sounds, which can make you feel relaxed and sleepy. You can try watching ASMR videos on YouTube or other video platforms.
83. If you’re struggling to consistently get 7-8 hours of sleep, or don’t feel rested after your usual hours of sleep, you can seek professional help from a doctor, psychiatrist, or sleep psychologist.
84. Meditate! When your thoughts wander and become stressful, practice meditation or pray to center yourself and change your focus.
Managing stress can help you cope with triggers and stressful events without turning to substances to cope. Stress management can help during small issues and big life events, making it a valuable tool for your recovery toolkit. Here’s a few ideas to jumpstart your toolkit:
85. Make it a habit to journal each day to process your day, reflect on what you’ve accomplished, and identify your goals for tomorrow.
86. Take small breaks as you work or study.
87. Spend time in nature as often as you can. On one of your breaks, for example, you could step outside or out on your balcony.
88. Make time to walk, play with, or snuggle your pets. Pets can soothe stress and calm your body.
89. Set up regular therapy appointments to discuss what’s stressing you and to learn practical coping skills.
90. Practice mindfulness and meditation throughout the day. This could be as simple as 2 minutes of deep, conscious breathing.
91. Eat well; prioritize healthy foods to nourish your mind and body.
92. Avoid or consume less caffeine and sugar. Caffeine in particular can make you jittery and more anxious.
93. Talk to a friend or loved one about your day.
94. Try new hobbies, like baking, crocheting, or painting to soothe stress and enjoy a creative outlet.
95. Listen to upbeat music or anything that lifts your mood. This could be a podcast, too.
96. Create a stress log and jot down what happened during the day and what your levels of stress were. This can help you identify pain points and move forward with healing.
97. Drink water throughout the day to keep your body hydrated and in homeostasis.
98. Set up a cozy, comfortable place in your home and pick up a good book.
99. Optimize your environment to reduce stress—decorate, light candles, open your windows, and more to make it a place you can go to for comfort.
100. Write down a list of activities, things, or people that you know help alleviate stress to keep all your coping tools quick and easy to access.
101. Connect with your peer support before, during and after treatment. You may use an app, attend a recovery peer support meeting, or connect with an online group of people in recovery.
Contributions by Sarah Shawaker and Grace Ogren
]]>So, what drives this inner critic, and what’s it really about? Why do we struggle to talk kindly to ourselves? And what can we do about it?
Self-criticism is a cognitive and emotional process of evaluating yourself negatively, focusing on personal flaws, mistakes, and perceived inadequacies. It involves a critical and harsh internal dialogue, often driven by high shame, guilt, and self-blame. Those who self-criticize tend to hold excessively high standards for themselves and are prone to self-judgment and self-punishment.
Self-criticism is often associated with psychological distress, including symptoms of depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem. It can hinder personal growth, impair interpersonal relationships, and contribute to a cycle of negative emotions and self-defeating behaviors.
Moreover, self-criticism has been linked to maladaptive emotion regulation strategies, such as perseveration, rumination, and avoidance, which can worsen psychological difficulties.
The fundamental premise of self-criticism lies in the fact that we are our own worst critics. We may find it easier to forgive others for their mistakes or overlook certain behaviors, but struggle to do the same for ourselves. This could stem from a desire for perfectionism or a fear of failure, perhaps due to an underlying need for approval from those around us or an inability to accept our imperfections.
Various psychological theories attempt to explain why we feel compelled toward self-criticism. The cognitive dissonance theory suggests that humans experience cognitive discomfort when their beliefs don’t match with reality, leading them towards self-judgment as a way of reducing this tension.
Meanwhile, attachment theory proposes that our early childhood relationships shape how we form attachments later in life. If these were negative, then it could lead to low self-esteem and feelings of inadequacy in adulthood, which can manifest as self-criticism.
Our past experiences also play a role in our likelihood to self-criticize; trauma, challenges, and/or criticism from parents or peers during childhood can stay with us into adulthood and affect our present view of self. While understanding the nature of self-criticism can help us identify its root causes, ultimately, we choose how we react—whether by embracing compassion or continuing down the path of judgmental thoughts.
We self-criticize for many reasons. One reason is that we’re trying to motivate ourselves to do better. We might think that if we tell ourselves how bad we are, we’ll be more likely to work harder and improve. But instead of motivating us, self-criticism can lead to feelings of hopelessness and despair.
Another reason why we engage in self-criticism is to please others. We might think that if we’re constantly critical of ourselves, others will think more highly of us. However, people are more likely to be drawn to those who are confident and self-assured.
Finally, we might engage in self-criticism because it’s a habit. We’ve been doing it for so long that it’s become automatic. But if self-criticism is getting in the way of your life, it’s time to break the habit.
The damaging effects of self-criticism can have a deep impact on mental health. It can lead to a fear of failure, preventing us from forming meaningful relationships with others. Self-critical thinking is often seen as a cycle that can be hard to break—the more we criticize ourselves, the more likely we are to continue this pattern. Here are some examples of how self-criticism can impact your mental health:
Recognizing the signs of negative thought patterns is essential to manage these destructive cycles before they become too habitual. If you find yourself frequently engaging in self-deprecating talk or comparing yourself harshly to others, then it’s important to take steps toward replacing these negative thoughts with positive affirmations and realistic goals.
Self-criticism can lead to shame, guilt, and depression. These emotions can then lead to substance use or other unhealthy coping mechanisms in an attempt to escape or numb the pain. In addition, self-criticism can interfere with your ability to develop healthy relationships and maintain healthy behaviors, which can further contribute to addiction.
For example, someone with addiction may feel ashamed of their behavior. This shame can lead to guilt and depression, which can then make them more likely to use substances to manage their emotions.
In addition, self-criticism can make it difficult for people to build healthy relationships. If someone constantly criticizes themselves, they may be reluctant to open up to others and share their struggles. This can lead to isolation and loneliness, which can also increase the risk of addiction.
Self-criticism is not the only contributing factor for addiction. However, it can be a significant factor, and should be considered when addressing addiction.
If you are struggling with addiction, it is important to seek help from a professional who can help you address the underlying issues contributing to your addiction. Many rehab facilities and programs can help you navigate addiction and co-occurring issues stemming from self-critical tendencies.
You can break the habit of self-criticism with the right strategies. To start, it’s important to acknowledge our negative thoughts and challenge their accuracy. We can also engage in positive self-talk, focusing on mindfulness, gratitude, and optimism rather than dwelling on failures or shortcomings.
Additionally, exercise and hobbies can distract from negative thinking while allowing creativity to flourish. Mindfulness practices such as meditation and setting realistic goals are also essential for managing expectations without placing too much pressure on ourselves.
Through these steps, we can learn how to be compassionate towards ourselves and build a healthier relationship with our inner critic—one that encourages self-compassion above all else. With this understanding, we will gain greater confidence in ourselves, which leads us down a path of improved relationships both internally and externally.
An important step is to be aware of your thoughts and feelings. When you catch yourself engaging in self-criticism, take a moment to challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if they’re really true, and if there’s a more helpful way to think about the situation.
Keeping yourself in a negative frame of mind can have adverse effects that can create or exacerbate depression, anxiety, ADHD, insomnia, and so much more. In addition, maintaining a negative perception can make you more likely to notice only the bad things in life, making it harder to access, appreciate, and believe the good.
Changing perspectives and focusing on controlling your perception can help you maintain a positive attitude and approach. So, instead of focusing on the negative, challenging yourself to reframe the same to a positive can help shift the existing behavioral pattern. For example, if you typically say:
Negative:
“You are a loser and you need to work harder to get your results”
shift to
Positive:
“I aspire to be healthy and strong and will work harder to match my vision”
Once practiced, this type of reframing can help shift perception from negative to positive in multiple areas of your life.
You can also customize affirmations to specific activities and goals, for example, here are some affirmations for working out:
Practicing saying and writing positive affirmations and gratitude daily can help improve your mental health and well-being. While starting this practice can often feel forced, the more you do it, the more likely you are to reach your goals.
It can help to talk to a mental health professional about your self-criticism. A rehab program, therapist, counselor, or coach can help you identify the root of your self-criticism and develop strategies for coping with it. Some questions to ask and explore with your provider can include:
* Is my self-criticism helpful or harmful?
* How can I be less self-critical?
* What can I do to be more positive about myself?
* What are some of the benefits of being less self-critical?
* What are some of the risks of being too self-critical?
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]]>AA slogans are more than just catchy phrases. These sayings serve as constant reminders of the program’s main tenets. They foster a sense of community and encouragement, reminding members that recovery is possible when you work the Steps and stay plugged into AA’s strong support network.
Let’s look closer at the meaning and impact of AA slogans, and how these powerful words are guiding lights on the path to lasting recovery.
AA slogans are short, memorable phrases that encapsulate the core values of Alcoholics Anonymous. Rooted in the shared wisdom of countless people who have worked the program, these sayings emerged organically in the early days of AA and have been passed down through generations. Each slogan is a reminder of core concepts like acceptance, humility, hope, and perseverance. By using and internalizing these slogans, AA members are encouraged to maintain their focus and deepen their connection to the AA community.
For many of those navigating the recovery journey, AA slogans are a daily source of inspiration. They often resonate with members in profoundly personal ways, providing comfort in moments of doubt.
Long-time AA member Gregory Forrest says “no pain, no gain” and other 12-Step sayings1 helped his recovery process:
“Slogans & sayings were so helpful when I was new, and still are today. The wisdom that is tossed around the rooms is awesome! The combination of these, meetings, a sponsor & the steps, helped me heal & stay sober.”
These sayings may or may not resonate with you—or you might find them useful at different stages of recovery. AA slogans remind us that we’re not alone in our struggles and that a supportive community is here to help us along the way.
Some AA slogans are so widely used, that they’ve become synonymous with the program’s philosophy. Here are some of the most popular sayings and their underlying messages:
This simple yet powerful motto reminds us to focus on the present moment so as not to get overwhelmed by the prospect of long-term sobriety. It encourages people to take recovery one, manageable step at a time.2
“We all have 24 hours in the day. No more, no less. The issue I have is staying present in that time frame. I have the tendency to project, worrying about the days, weeks and months ahead. Being where I am today, is exactly where I should be and this slogan helps remind me of that important fact.”
– Craig C., AA member
This slogan reminds members to take things slowly and not put unnecessary pressure on themselves during the recovery process. It emphasizes the importance of patience, self-compassion, and accepting setbacks as a normal part of the journey.
This encourages people to prioritize their recovery before focusing on other aspects of their lives. It emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries, saying “no” to situations that might jeopardize sobriety, and practicing self-care.
This encourages people to practice patience and acceptance towards themselves and others. It reminds them not to judge others’ actions, and to instead focus on their own self-growth.
This reminds members that recovery is a journey, not a destination. It emphasizes the importance of celebrating small wins and remembering that progress takes time.
This tells members to surrender to a higher power, whether a spiritual belief system or a universal source. It encourages people in recovery to trust the process and stop stressing over things that are beyond their control.
These small but mighty messages offer hope for people navigating the challenges of addiction recovery. By reflecting on their meaning and incorporating it into their daily lives, AA members can find strength, resilience, and a deeper connection to the community.
The messages AA slogans carry can be valuable tools for navigating daily challenges. Here are some simple ways you can use AA sayings to strengthen your daily recovery practice:
Working these mottoes into your daily routines can help you strengthen your positive mindset, grow your emotional resilience, and renew your motivation to stick with the recovery process—even when times are tough.
AA slogans foster fellowship and a sense of shared experience. You’ll often hear their meaning discussed at meetings, or used to counsel a member who’s struggling.
Slogans are just one microcosm of the supportive environment that defines AA communities. Reinforcing shared goals and values strengthens bonds and empowers members to navigate their challenges together. That sense of belonging and community is vital for long-term recovery. By using these messages as a basis for social support, members learn to navigate their journeys and contribute to AA’s strong support network.
While AA slogans offer invaluable support for many in recovery, some people may initially be skeptical about their effectiveness. While some may find them overly simplistic, or feel that certain slogans don’t resonate with their own experiences.
If this is the case for you, know that these challenges are valid. AA slogans aren’t meant to be rigid rules or prescriptive solutions—they’re more like starting points for your reflection. If a certain slogan doesn’t resonate with you, feel free to explore others or create your own mantras that serve your needs.
Remember: your recovery journey is your own. AA slogans are just one more tool for your toolbox, and they can be adapted and applied in the way that makes the most sense for you. What matters is that you find what inspires you to continue the journey towards a joyous, fulfilling, and sober life.
If you’re ready to recover and looking for an addiction treatment program based on AA philosophy, see our list of 12-Step rehabs to compare programs and reach out to admissions staff directly.
AA slogans are concise phrases embodying the core principles of the 12 Steps. They carry the collective wisdom of the AA community and serve as daily reminders of the program’s core principles. Use them in your recovery for inspiration, connection to the community, and reminders of the possibility of lasting sobriety.
Integrating AA slogans into daily life can enhance your commitment to recovery. Create visual reminders, reflect on their deeper meanings, or use them as mantras in challenging times.
We often think of burnout as a result of our own failure to achieve the perfect work-life balance. But more often, it’s the result of a larger cultural expectation that values productivity over human needs. Thankfully, as more people talk openly about their experiences with burnout, workplace culture is changing.
Recognizing early warning signs can help you address burnout before it becomes acute. Eventually, you’ll learn to make lifestyle changes that prevent it from happening in the first place.
High performers—driven, ambitious people who excel in their fields—are often admired for their relentless dedication. But beneath the surface of achievement can lurk a hidden threat: burnout. Burnout is a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged excessive demands and pressure to succeed.
This is not simply feeling tired after a long day; it’s a chronic depletion of your internal resources. It’s not uncommon for people with burnout to feel unable to get out of bed in the morning, or exhausted in everything they do. Burnout can sap the very motivation that caused you to work so hard toward your goals in the first place.
Once burnout sets in, its effects are serious and recovery takes time. That’s why it’s so important for high achievers to learn to notice its signs.
Here are some common signs of burnout in high performers:
It’s easy to miss warning signs when we’re driven by the constant pursuit of success. This is especially true if we come from a culture that values hard work and struggle.
Tricia Hersey (also known as the Nap Bishop),2 founder of the Nap Ministry, espouses rest as a way of reclaiming our right to personhood. “We think grinding and not sleeping is going to get us to the end,” she says, “but actually nothing generative can come from it.”
There are also clinically recognized self-assessment tools that can help you gauge your risk of burnout:
Both of these can provide insight, but they’re not diagnostic tools. While high scores on each may signal burnout risk, a professional evaluation can offer a more accurate and complete picture of your mental health.
High-performer burnout isn’t simply a consequence of hard work; it’s fueled by internal and external factors:
“This quest for perfection4 is based in the assumption that we must change ourselves to belong…Imperfection is not our personal problem—it is a natural part of existing.”
– Tara Brach
Societal norms that glorify the “grind” mentality and equate self-worth with productivity also play a major role. The continual pressure to maintain an image of success leaves people feeling like they’re running on empty with no end in sight.
Hersey explains how grind culture breaks down our self-worth:5 “We feel like we’re not anything if we’re not producing, making, going. What a lie.”
Preventing burnout it’s about sacrificing ambition. It’s about cultivating a smarter, more sustainable approach to success.
“There’s no work-life balance equation that works for everyone.6 It needs to be tailored to your needs and to your own aspirations, and that’s highly variable,” says clinical physician and burnout coach Dr. Azad John-Salimi.
High performers can try these small shifts:
Big, overnight changes aren’t always possible—not everyone can reduce their hours or take significant time off work. It’s important to honor this as a reality: burnout is often created by conditions beyond our control. But even when we can’t change our entire situation, we can make small changes that, over time, noticeably impact how we feel.
“For some of us, we’re not able to make such swift changes, because there are other things at play or other people who depend on us. There is a process, and you can map it out, in terms of making strategic changes that allow you to make bigger changes later,” says John-Salimi.
The key here is evaluating your relationship to work, reclaiming your right to recharge, and finding the right balance for you.
If you’ve crossed the threshold into burnout, the road back can seem daunting. But remember, burnout is not a permanent sentence; it’s a call to course-correct and reclaim your well-being. These key steps can guide your recovery:
Carve out time to truly rest. Disconnecting from technology and engaging in nurturing activities like nature walks or creative processes can be deeply restorative. Listen to your body’s cues and prioritize sleep: the ultimate recharge for a stressed mind and body.
Don’t hesitate to seek professional guidance from a therapist or coach who specializes in burnout. They can equip you with tools for managing stress, setting boundaries, and rebuilding your self-worth outside of work.
Burnout often signals a need to recalibrate your goals and expectations. Revisit your priorities, identify what truly matters, and adjust your goals accordingly. For many, this means embracing a more sustainable pace. True success isn’t measured by constant hustle, but by the fulfillment you find in the journey.
Hersey describes the changes she saw when she started resting more8 after a period of severe burnout in college:
“I started to see so much happening from an intellectual perspective, from a spiritual perspective. It boosted my self-esteem. I felt better, I looked better, I was getting better grades. I began to get ideas that I wouldn’t have gotten from an exhausted state.”
Emerging from burnout is a process—and it might take longer than you expect. But the rewards of healing are so worth it.
True high performance isn’t fueled by exhaustion, it’s powered by balance. Success is the result of consistency over time—and to achieve that, you need a sustainable approach.
You may not be able to quit your job and move to a mountaintop, but you can integrate downtime into a busy schedule. Start by carving out time, however brief, to do what brings you joy on a daily basis. These moments allow you to reconnect with yourself and remember who you are at your core, regardless of what’s on your plate that day.
This doesn’t just make you feel better. Work breaks refresh focus, reduce stress, and rekindle creativity. Even famously high achievers like Bill Gates take time to recharge, and other executives are now applying Gates-inspired “think weeks”9 to their schedules.
Communicating about burnout at work can help you reduce isolation and advocate for change. Talking to a trusted colleague, mentor, or supervisor about burnout and mental health can pave the way to a more supportive work environment.
Fortunately, workplaces are starting to shift toward a more employee-centered culture. More leadership teams take burnout prevention seriously. Some companies are shifting to shorter work weeks, adopting more liberal PTO policies, or offering free subscriptions to wellness apps. While none of these is a complete solution, it is a sign that the conversation around workplace culture is moving in a positive direction.
Stigma is one of the biggest barriers to mental health treatment, especially for high performers. Executives are less likely to seek help for burnout10 because of their position. But burnout isn’t a shortcoming; it’s a natural response to chronic stress.
Professional support can be hugely helpful in addressing burnout. A therapist or coach can help you grow your toolkit for managing stress, setting boundaries, and cultivating self-compassion. Some even specialize in treating high-performance clientele.
Proactively addressing your burnout by getting professional help is a testament to your commitment to your well-being and your career. By taking charge of your recovery journey, you can reclaim your balance and return to work with renewed resilience.
As Hersey says: “If you’re not resting, you won’t make it. And we need us to make it.”
If you’re looking for an intensive opportunity to focus on your recovery, search for burnout treatment programs and reach out to centers directly today.
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